Expectations

In the middle of this lovely Christmas season I failed
Circumstances became so rushed I didn’t get everything done,
And some one else was forced to clean up after me.

I didn’t meet the expectations of who I was and what my job is.
I suppose on the world level of things, it wasn’t much of a failure.
But it caused a strain.

What I’m responsible for, I need to follow through on.
And when that doesn’t happen, other people have to pick up.
And they have plenty to do themselves.

God help me manage my time better.
Don’t let me forget the little things.
And help me know which expectations I must live up to.

Certainly it wasn’t the first time, nor most likely the last,
When I do not meet the expectations others hold for me.
Help me not to let that become the measurement of my life.

But, most of all help me do my best to fix things,
Then give it to you instead of torturing myself with it.
Help me find the balance I need between me, you, and others.

Why do these things keep moving about in my life?
The balance between practicality – things that must be done –
And the creative urges that fulfill the gifts you have given me?

Only you can grant me enough practical wisdom to be useful.
Only you can give me presence of mind to attend to the practical things.
Help me cross over from the purely creative to the practical organization of their presentation.

Help me rely more on the people whose nature is the practical presentation of things.
Those to whom these things make as much sense as creative endeavor does to me.
Help me rely on you to know when I’ve reached the end of my abilities, and need help.

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